The Wisdom and Scope of Whose Plan?

As I wrote in my last post, I've been spending quite a bit of time lately processing what the next step in my life is going to be. Most of us have, and all of us will go through points in our lives when these decisions and opportunities present themselves to us. But what is our response?

Ephesians 3:14 came to mind last time I spent some time thinking about it: 'When I think of the wisdom and scope of God's plans, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father...' I was reflecting on that for a few minutes, when the thought came to my mind, 'It's the wisdom and scope of God's plan.'

My amazing mother wrote me a letter last week. In it she asked, 'So what are those things that are most important to you: School? Ministry? Relationship?' That question helped me to narrow my focus and choices. But as I tried to look beyond this summer, this year, the next five years, the thought became (as it often does) overwhelming. Not in resignation, but in an attempt at surrender, I simply said, 'God, what do you want?'

That thought shouldn't be new to any Christian. But it clicked something for me. So often, we make decisions based on what we want or what is important to us right at the time. But it's not our ability to plan that God wants. It is God's plan that should overwhelm us and bring us to our knees. What if we set our own ideas aside, and simply asked God, 'What do you want?'

'I fall to my knees...'

In Ephesians 3:14, Paul says, 'When I think of the wisdom and scope of God's plan, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father...'

I may be taking this a little out of context, but it best reflects what I want to say right now. I have some serious decisions coming up, and not only about whether to move back to Oregon or stay in New York, although that's one of them. There are only a few times in our lives when we get to (or have to) make decisions that will have lasting impact; decisions that will affect career, relationships, family. Over the last couple weeks, I've been pondering a lot of these decisions. I told my uncle's friend, George, the other day, 'I can't imagine living to be 70. I'm only 22, and I'm already having a hard time figuring out my life! I can't imagine another 60 years of making these decisions.'

As I spend time trying to understand what God is telling me to do and what I feel best about doing, I take comfort in remembering everything that has already happened in my life, all the blessings and opportunities I've had:

I have amazing friends and family, across the entire country
I've been able to travel from coast-to-coast more times than some people even travel outside their home state!
I've been a part of amazing church bodies
I've attended a life-changing school of ministry, which led to the opportunity to work in ministry full-time, being a part of changing peoples' lives
I've lived in Oregon and New York (and a few places in between)
I've worked at Britt and seen and met more award-winning artists than I can count anymore
I've been on several powerful missions trips, including one to Israel (that was too dang short!)
And this is all just off the top of my head; if I took the time to think of every person and relationship and opportunity I've been blessed with, 'I suppose that if all the other things Jesus did were written down, the whole world could not contain the books.'

I don't want this to read as a list of 'why my life is better than yours,' or all the things that make me so cool. What I'm trying to say is that, even though I am genuinely nervous about what this next part of my life is going to contain, I can remember what God has done for me, and trust that he'll see me through this, as well. Shoot, I'd even go so far as to say that maybe I'll have a fulfilling and successful life when all is said and done.

Solo in the City

God help me, I think I just made a 'Sex in the City' pun...

It's been a couple weeks now since I made my first trip into NYC. Amanda recently informed me that I don't blog enough to maintain readers' attention, so I figured it was about time I got this one up!

My buddy Andy from the one and only Medford, Oregon was in NY for a cheese festival. Yes, a cheese festival. I didn't know if it was some little local event or what, but apparently it was a pretty hoity-toity gig. We're talking private parties, four-star restaurants, Cheese Monger secret parties... I think he said it was something like a $6 million event for the weekend. And yes, I just said 'Cheese Monger'.

So Andy and I figured it out, and we decided to meet in the city to catch a Yankee game while he was in town. He was busy cheese festival-ing all day, so I headed into the city early to wander around by myself. There are so many things I wanna do and places I wanna see in NYC, but for anyone who knows me well, you'll understand why making my first trip to the city by myself and just exploring was perfect.

The train ride to Penn Station from Port Jeff is about two hours, but being here has completely changed my perspective on what a 'long trip' is, so it goes by very quickly. I think a lot of people mistake 'living in New York' to mean 'living in New York City,' and they're two very different things. I live on Long Island; there are lots of trees, strip malls, and neighborhoods. I got off the train at Penn Station and walked onto street level, and I felt like I was officially experiencing New York.

I couldn't count how many blocks I walked up and down the streets that day, but it was a lot of backtracking, cutting back and forth, and general exploring. I think there are only two places I really want to visit that I didn't make it to: The Great Lawn in Central Park, and Ground Zero. Ground Zero is way south, at least 50 blocks, I think, so I didn't make that walk. And I walked for 15-20 minutes through Central Park and didn't even make it halfway through it! It's definitely the biggest, and one of the prettiest, parks I've ever been to. Can't wait to go get a game of ultimate on in Central Park and bring a little Southern Oregon to the city :)

My family has always really liked New York photography and landmarks, so I've been looking at pictures all my life of places around the city, and I finally got to go check them out! I was at Rockefeller Center (can't wait to go there during the winter), Central Park, Times Square, Broadway, St. Patrick's Cathedral, and Columbus Circle, not to freakin' mention Yankee Stadium that night with Andy! I also tried to find the public bathroom in the Marriott Marquis Times Square, which I've been told is the best public restroom in Times Square, but I didn't feel like wandering around an entire hotel. I'll make sure I find it next time, Steve.

It was a great first trip to the city. I went in with no plans, no friends to meet, no idea where anything was in the city, and no money. I feel like that's pretty much how my life goes! But it was great. And if I had this much fun just going for a couple hours to wander, I can only imagine how hard it will rock when I go in to do dinner and a show or something!

Living in NY: Top 5

It's been about a month now, and so far, here are the five things I've come to appreciate most about NY. Keep in mind, these are things specific to New York, not necessarily things I'd get living in any big city.

1.  Seeing family! Being closer to this side of the family has been awesome. I've had to chance to meet so much family I'd never even met before, and seen lots of other family who I hadn't seen in years. For the 4th of July, we had a big BBQ slash going away party for my cousin Ricky who's joining the Marines. I saw my Uncle Mike for the first time in 11 years. I met his son Michael for the first time ever! I saw my grandma for the first time in about two years. My grandma and two of her three living sisters were together for the first time in about 40 years! People were in tears when all the family started showing up. It was awesome.

2.  Live Yankee games. I can't explain how disappointed I am that I will never see a game in The House That Ruth Built. Nonetheless, tripping into NYC to wander the city, then catching a game with Andy, was amazing. The stadium is beautiful, there's no such thing as a bad seat, and I was in freakin' Yankee Stadium! I can't wait to go back for my next game (maybe a playoff series if I'm still here...)

3.  Every Yankee game is broadcast. On the West Coast, the only time I see the Yankees play is if it's against the Mariners, maybe against the Angels, or during the playoffs. Sometimes a Yankee-Red Sox or Yankee-Met game would make it on TV, but not all of them. Out here, every game they play all season is on network TV. Which means I get to come home after work and regardless of day or time or opponent, a Yankee game is almost always on.

4.  New York accents. I love 'em. And everyone here has one. That's all.

5.  Driving. Nobody calls me an aggressive driver, nobody gets pissed off and tailgates me when I cut back and forth. My driving fits right in on Long Island, and I like driving however the heck I want, while everyone else does the same.